i have known my friend for 12+ years and his wife for 10+ years. they got married last december and they are both seemingly happy with a child. but last month we were all had a get-together and having a good time and she gave me a lap dance when her husband went to go to the bathroom. she was laughing, so it wasnt like it was erotic or romantic, she was just playing around. but what she didnt know was that for the past 6 or 7 years i’ve been physically attracted to her. i’ve even had sex while thinking about her (more than once)

but after that lap dance things kicked into a downward spiral that i enjoy SO much. things went from dances to rubbing when we walk by eachother, to dirty messages (in both email & text form) and eventually we hooked up one day when her husband was off at work and her kid was with his grandparents, then again a few days later, then again, and again. the one time i went over and my intentions were not for that, i was returning a miter saw that i borrowed and we ended up doing it in the kitchen.

i hadn’t really felt guilty up until last Friday when he was at work, and her kid was actually in the house when we did it (he’s 4) and he walked in on us and asked what the noise was and she told him that we were wrestling and he said "can i play?" and i said no (cuz we were naked) and she said maybe anothertime. we discussed the situation, and i felt pretty bad after that, and the whole weekend up until now. he’s a good friend and a cool guy, i recently helped him install wood flooring in their house and we just hung out and had a few drinks afterwards. there is no tension or awkwardness when we are all around but i dont want to be the cause of their separation and lose 2 good friends. so what can i do now to quit while i’m ahead? i mean she is the best i’ve ever had, and she tells me im the best vaginal + oral partner she’s ever had(whether its truth or a false confidence booster who knows) but i cant deal with the guilt and i know this will eventually end badly if it continues, so i need to end it. its like kicking an addiction to the curb. i need to know how to quit before i ruin a good marriage